Poem: A hundred drops per second

When I met you, you hated yourself
Like you were afraid of yourself
As the storms went on,
You found it to be best to be by yourself
And there,
I was,
Watching a man crumble in front of my very timid but sparkling eyes
It was no surprise
You liked salt wounds and touching my inner thighs
But I –
I bask when I wake with the sunrise
And you –
You look down on me for loving everything until it dies
You hate the earth
And you wonder why
It doesn’t pity you back

I moved out, clean new apartment
Living with a friend
I’m working on my craft
No longer at my wit’s end
Looking forward to all the money I’ll spend
Me?
And you?
Will we ever make amends?

I care no longer
I wouldn’t bother
Oh, your poor father
He knows what’s in the water

I care no longer
I wouldn’t bother
Oh, your poor father
He knows what’s in the water

If I were to swim
To you
To build a new continent
I’d turn around
Find a river raft
You think I’m strange and daft
Never read any of my first drafts
Fell out of love just like that

Now you –
Hopefully you’ll remember the words I’ve said
But it no longer matters to me
Whether you’re alive or dead
Instead

Don’t lose your head
It’s not worth it
We were perfect
But we weren’t
And I’m gasping
For thin air like –

A hundred drops per second

©️ Elle Silvestrov

Poem: James Davies

When I threw away the dying white roses you bought for me
I almost cried myself to death
When I touched the petals
(They were so soft)
Like me
Untouched
Delicate
You robbed me of my own sanity
And it got so fucked I broke away from reality

You robbed me of my own sanity

Take your medication, baby, please don’t stop
Taking your medication
I care so much for you that my heart keeps breaking
Because you’re not next to me in bed and I can’t fall asleep because I’m shaking
I’m so afraid of you
But I’m more afraid of what I’m going to do without you
Do you have any idea how much I love you?

Sweet river beds
I leaned against your car smoking like I’m from Tennessee
And you weren’t even man enough to comfort me
You like to call it “enabling”
But a girl crying over you will only stop crying when you touch her
Hold her like it’s your last day alive
And you know the last memories are the memories we keep
But all I can think of is you screaming at me
You were screaming at me
But you said you were in love with me

You robbed me of my own sanity
But it was only because I was too insane to see
You weren’t good for me
You weren’t good for me
James Davies
You were never my safety

I’m so helpless, it’s scary

Though I know Monday morning I’ll wake up
Sipping my L-theanine-filled green tea in my Moscow teacup
I won’t text you
Won’t say wassup
Because you and I are no longer
Babe, I hope you take a seat and ponder

How weak you made me

Tears cover my cheekbones
I can barely read these pages
Felt I’d love you for ages
But you tested my patience

How weak you made me
This is what became of me

How weak you made me

Poem: Fading, gracefully

Poem: Fading, gracefully

My passion is in my work but sometimes it fades
I dress up, I’m ready, to have the most perfect of days
Something charcoal and black gets in my way

A peaceful slumber, I’ve rested
Breakfast is toast
Licking jam off my fingers
The scent of your cologne
I have nothing to do today but write, write, write

Born an academic
I found my love on the field
Pointing straight at my target– focus and press
Down on the trigger, life’s a sweet mess
Baby, we eventually do our best

He said my name sounds expensive

He said my name sounds expensive
Like a luxurious bath
Candles and Ella Fitzgerald in the back
I’m curious about my own tastes
I’m establishing a new state of rebuilding an identity that I lost when we broke off the engagement
Led to a crisp stalemate
And what it necessitates
Is a return to sensuality and glamour
Floral dresses because flowers are part of my soul even though I don’t believe in humanistic psychology
However,
I do like what the existentialists posed
I’m no longer scared to see of what dust I am composed
I stay asleep on such a heavy dose

The rain falls like sugar into a small child’s fragile hands

You shouldn’t be scared of me either
When it rains I’m like in the garden of Eden
You and me, we’re on the same page, something is even
But when I’m alone
I rip out the pages, shivering down to my bones
I let the call ring then hang up the telephone
No service in my castle, but I’m in my zone
Wait for the beat to drop
Babe you’re acting so nonchalant
It’s okay, it’s enough, it’s time to stop
The beautiful rainfall begins to drop
It shimmers
Across my spine

Stick out my tongue because rain tastes heavy
Move my arms up like I’m soaking already
Stick out my tongue because rain tastes heavy
Move my arms down like I’m dead already

Move my arms down like I’m dead already

Nothing like Chicago rainfall


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Poem: En juillet, la pluie tant attendue est enfin tombée.

Poem: En juillet, la pluie tant attendue est enfin tombée.

Your 4 by 4
My innocence
Sweet hot suspense
90 miles per hour on the curves up the mountain, to show me what you know about being intense
Rain comes down and I’m listening to the Bends

I want to keep tabs on you even though it’s the wrong thing to do
Like deja vu
I’m rose, you’re blue
Falling off the skyscrapers ’cause I’m having fun
Nobody says I’m beautiful
I know it’s not that pitiful
And I’m so damn ill, it hurts

I found rejection in the cusp of a rose
I rolled my eyes and thought, of course

Congeniality isn’t my default
I had in mind all of these things to say
But I’m inclined to say I no longer get my way
For the devil’s child, it’s gotten late
I found,
You down
On your darkest day
I had in mind all of these things to say
I wanted to tell you I felt you fading away
And that wasn’t okay

I have a feeling you need to find yourself again
But I’m scared to leave because I know you need some help

I have a feeling you need to find yourself again
But I’m scared to leave because I know you need some help
I know you need some help

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