Poem: 1933-1945

 
 

We would like you to enlist in our services.

For some people, war is war. For others – dear mother. Russian Proverb 

 

The painting of slogans on buildings
Young people were attracted to a group that offered adventure
Distinctive military appearances
Who achieved more?
We were all keeping score

The unquestioned leader
Officers and politicians
Ugh, so nationalistic
My brother, he had
A stern political career
Damaged
In the postwar years
He blamed his associates

Secret meetings
Apocalyptic trains
That would combust all of a sudden
Confidential minutes of a downhill argument
When you’re Russian they think you’re very clever
All a hoax
From the flood, a new world will be born
Signs and wonders are seen
From the unruly flood
Come Holy Spirit creator
Salvation is to befall

 

Ukraine

Liberation of humanity
Whine about wretched nest eggs
His lack of success
No chance of survival
Less-than-mediocre poet
He died just like that

Nobody cried about it

 


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Poem: Cold coffee, prescription

Lilac Dove 

 

 

My lithium level is too high
I downloaded an app that helps me see the night sky
I bike on the trail by the river
I’m hesitant to ride next to cars
I’m a baby, but I just know how impulsive I can be
If I was in Chicago, I’d traverse the entire city
Flirt with cashiers to get free coffee
Who am I trying to be

Radiohead on rainy days
Trying to not revert to my old ways
It’s a gamble
How I want him
Unstable
As a matter of fact
One of those things that won’t happen
But at least I like someone sane
Upgrade to first class
She went to the doctor; they found a mass
I come home and it’s home at last

I’m skeptical towards new things
I thought about packing up all my belongings
My diamond ring
I never thought about selling it
It never crossed my mind
Those were beautiful times
It’s winter now and I’m getting by
Cold coffee
Touching the pot when it’s warm
Closure doesn’t exist, stop calling me
Listen to voicemails when I’m sad
I wish there were some from my late dad
I wish he could be someone’s father-in-law
Wedding traditions

Here’s your prescription
Three times a day
I’m the girl with the fortitude
I miss the feeling of being understood
Nothing better than listening to the Neighbourhood
Makes any day tolerable
Who in your life makes you feel vulnerable?
For a while I was untouchable

I’ve got a penchant for listening to music in the shower
I watch the sunrise, I’m awake at that hour
I’m glad we’re not together because he’s such a coward
Perfectly fine with abusing his power
Moving on is hard, I admit
That’s just the reality of it

Doing things for yourself
To escape
Decorating
A cassette tape
Glitter and blue ink
Life is best immersed in pink
I’m stable, what do you think?

No, tell me
What do you think?

 

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    Poem: Ivory white bones


    roses, coffee, petal of a rose

    I’m out of bed
    Looking around
    Like
    This
    Is
    My
    Life
    And I live here
    Breathe here
    Lay in bed all day like I’m Lana Del Rey 
    Nothing special
    Cool like ice 
    If I had someone to buy me diamonds that’d be nice 
    And faux fur so soft that you think it’s mink 
    I’m headed for a revolution, I think

    Lately I don’t feel right
    Something isn’t set in stone 
    They’re small, my ivory white bones 
    I wonder particularly what their colors are
    I wonder if he can think about me when we’re displaced so far
    Blueberries and coffee
    Strawberries and pie 
    I got tired of thinking I needed a guy 
    I can pitch a tent and perfectly tie a tie 
    I’m the one that gets to be the bad guy 

    Sometimes I huddle up real small
    It helps when there’s darling, sparkling rainfall 
    I’m still scared of monsters
    They walk on the streets 
    I’m afraid of the boys that crawl into sleeping girls’ bedsheets 
    Without saying a thing

    You on my planet?  
    I could use a friend
    I have too many things to comprehend 
    Too paranoid of my notebooks to be found
    I close my eyes and I spin around 

    I spin around
    Touchdown 
    Take me down
    Just take me somewhere nice and let me spin for now 

    Find me dead downtown

     


    D O V E

    I woke up today

    Client Logo
    Dandelions
    in the summertime

    Keepsakes

    Client Logo
    Love to have the breeze go by
    stored memories

    Your favorite band

    Client Logo
    plays on the radio
    feed your head


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    Gem

    Poem: Reflections on tobacco

    Reflections on tobacco

    I’ve been occupying myself with novel things so I don’t have to think.

    I’m gracious, I stopped smoking cigarettes

    I didn’t smoke them because they made me feel good; I’d go out for the brief “thinking hour,” the time I had with myself. 

    And if someone was smoking with me, I was still swimming somewhere near the branches of the distances pointing inward of my mind. Swimming in circles. Taking private jet planes. 

    I think of picking the habit up again (foolish) just to rest my leg on the side of a closed storefront and come to terms with what is and what was. 

    I can do that now, if I wanted to. But I don’t want to. Mold like clay. Sweet summer’s day. 

    I hope I don’t meet anyone who smokes soon.

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    Steel trains

    I am bored and companionless
    I come home, shut the steel door
    Lock it 4, 5, 14 times
    Grace my palm across the slate kitchen counter
    Indulge in the cleanliness of no longer having someone occupy my chateau
    My alcazar
    Mine

    The train runs by
    Fifty times an hour
    And I suck in the fumes like a child enjoys putting their hands on a hot stove
    Ice

    There’s a moody sky above
    So I prepare for my favorite part of existence,
    Standing on my balcony smoking menthol cigarettes alone
    Careful where I ash
    Watching the city skyline in the distance
    Men in grey and black suits
    Serving their role
    They inspire me with their daily perseverance
    Don’t mock it till you try it

    I used to be afraid of the dark
    Now the dark to me is Pittsburgh grey
    I empty my handbag’s contents and find
    1 pigeon feather
    I feel like I have it all together
    Even the birds want to be me

    I am bored and companionless
    The city skyline says it’s time
    The felted wool of my grandmother’s blanket comforts me these minutes, now
    Preoccupied
    With wondering
    About the Industrial Revolution and how to identify a black widow
    I’m on edge, can’t you tell
    I’m searching for something

    I’m on edge, can’t you tell
    I’m always searching for something