Free verse love poem: Speaking volumes (white florals)

Free verse love poem: Speaking volumes (white florals)

I’m in the pool, with your gentle gaze moving toward the horizon
Smooth riverbeds, crashing yet
Solemn
Tender in their collapsing wake
My sovereign ways trap you like hurricanes
Find slumber in the rectitude of my rendition of a classic painting of a
Prince attending to a young queen
Dismayed at her place, though in a quiet peace,
That glances violently towards a moral upbringing
A softness I couldn’t portray

The Dressing of the Favorite (1857), oil on canvas, by Henri Pierre Picou (French, 1824-1895)

A sea-foam fog dynasty I swore was mine
I told you the truth
It mattered to me
I found thoughts in my mind that I couldn’t hold back, entirely
Though I did my best,
To provide you with rest
My satin sheath, vibrant with scarlet cardinal fibers
The delicate breeze, like rapture
Golden but never, truth be told, reflecting lightning that makes marks in the sky
A tribute to no one
Is every structure soon to fall down?
The bolts unfastened, my lace dress & ultramarine form
A silhouette only God could have created
A boldness that scares away anyone who isn’t
Strong enough
To hold a woman in his arms and
Not want to change her

The light pink August calendar I have on my contemporary glass tabletop
That forgot the date when we
Began things
Paved was our course with giving looks at each other like we’re in a vintage film
A theatre for just the two of us
Hopeful dedication
Watching our past conversations and having new conversations about those from before
We don’t run out of things to talk about
But when you find me watching the cars on the road pass by us, viciously,
Counting the trucks
Taking note of their model and make
You see something in me that I could not tell you
Not because I can’t find the right words
I always find the right words

Along the Siene, Winter (1887) by Frederick Childe Hassam (American impressionist painter, 1859-1935)

I don’t know what you know
And I don’t know if you know me
But when your gaze becomes increasingly familiar, I cascade into a
Reflection interrupted by the silliest words you stream together
A childlike ambiance, golden in accuracy
Crisp like a wave’s current
Interjected with passing a cigarette lighter
Getting higher
From rays of the subtle light of day,
Muted only in temperament
Dulcet on the edges
I told you I was yours
I meant it, of course

Le Baiser (The Kiss) (commissioned by the French state in 1888, carved between 1888-98) by Auguste Rodin (French sculptor, 1840-1917)

We stop at the gas station; you run in to the corner store; you bring me honey green tea
For your girl (that is a friend)
Patient and kind
A dove’s brisk white feathers
Softer than mankind
Rougher than a woman’s fingertips
Comfortable in the chaos
Surrendering to a time when you could count the green specks in my eyes
And smell my white floral perfume

It seems as of now we have moved on to the Heavens
Where you call me Venus
And I mistake you for someone I’ve never known before
An oceanic climate to the boulders we create
When we feel inclined to say
Why do I like you so much?
Why do I like when you’re rough?
I do still find, thinking to myself, whether I’m good enough
But when the porch light comes on,
I move the thought along
To the binder where I keep my disarrayed opinions
Resolving to find
Some water to allow
My throat to stop tightening when I get up during the night
Patience, my ever-present accomplishment, finds its way to you
Presenting an elegance you couldn’t get from anyone else

Improvisation (1899) by Frederick Childe Hassam (1859-1935), oil on canvas

I find myself in spaces
When you are absent
Distress being transient
Because your face is

A discernment I couldn’t get from anyone else

The Aleutian mountains and the disintegrating cliffs
Couldn’t mask the foundation I thought we’d bring
Resolving to find
Some water to allow

My throat to stop closing when I sleep at night
I wonder if styrofoam composure could fail to observe my fright
To weave in serenity in light shades of pink,

On days like today, I’m unsure how to drink
Come, lay in bed

paypal.me/LilacDoveCA

Poem: Baby-blue automobiles

Poem: Baby-blue automobiles (yeah, you)

I ask you, “then how come we aren’t together?”
While you put your cigarette out in the pocket of your sweater,
And I think you’re confused
No way out, know I’ll lose
It’s not like I’ve given every last chance straight to you

Vintage baby-blue automobiles
Crystals, fragrance
Modern, ancient
Total & never-ending disengagement
Yeah, I meant it
Otherwise, I wouldn’t have said it
Vintage baby-blue automobiles
Hot like you’re burning, red hot wheels
I’ve already memorized how me leaving is supposed to feel

Sliding down playgrounds with a grey balloon in my hand
Wearing my Chicago Cubs baseball cap because I’m their biggest fan
You make fun of how pale I am, how I never seem to tan
It’s like this
It’s like this
Turn towards me
Turn towards me
One soft lock of hair, boy with a nosebleed

It’s like this
It’s like this
Just sit still
(Just stay still)
Mornings sitting on the hood of your car
Talking about how in our lives we haven’t made it very far
Vintage baby-blue automobiles
Prove to me that this time your love will be real
Promise and don’t lie that like summer, I will feel
Turn towards me
Turn towards me

It’s like this
It’s like this
Just sit still
(Fucking stay still!)
Mornings sitting on the trunk of your car
Talking about how, baby, you’re gonna be a star
Vintage baby-blue automobiles
Swear to me that this time your love will be real
Promise and don’t lie that the ocean will turn me surreal
Make me feel hopeless

You’re perfect
So worth it
You’re perfect
So worth it

You hurt me
On purpose
You’re perfect
So worth it

On purpose
So worthless

You’re perfect
So worthless
Baby-blue automobiles

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Spotify playlists for your enjoyment: https://open.spotify.com/user/silvvv35?si=9b399ba528a54abf

Poem: How little I meant

Poem: How little I meant

Live in modest obscurity
Classic California beach living
Sunglasses, shades, Maseratis, fast cars, soda pop
A life that has been glamorized
Or so I had hypothesized
He wouldn’t even be reading in between my lines
Too busy thinking about himself all the time

Perhaps a few motels overlooking the coast
Empty parking lots
Paint a vision for yourself
Soft ice cream in all good health
Said you were sober, had liquor on the top shelf
Honey, I thought you loved yourself

Ladies, you know me for my diamonds
I’ll show you everything sparkly that’s designer
That girl you once knew, you’re right behind her
To enjoy the high life without mascara on
To come to rise with the evening sun
To know how to really know someone
Stay omnipresent – hot, wild, and young
Like every morning, a new life has just begun
Dark spaces for dark traces of ice-cold skeletons
Bones only fit like fragments
Do what you’re told
Let your dream love life in front of you start to unfold

Everything in the right order
Everything in the right order
Everything all the same
Everything all the same

Lying between last quarter and new moon
I figured when we’d talk, we would be with each other soon
There are words on my body, on yours – video game cartoons
You never meant to express how little I meant to you

I started noticing in conversation
When the focus was on us, you lacked elation
I quit my work for you, I gave up waiting
I became so exhausted not living, but waiting
I tried to show you I was patient
You hate yourself like you’re tainted
Letting of go of the dream that one day you and I would make it

Now I’m in the doorway, sort of half-naked
I’m alone, but I’m tranquil, and nothing you do will change it

I’m alone but I’m tranquil
Nothing you do will change it

Poem: Soft times

Poem: Soft times

I threw a cigarette down on the ground while it was still lit and burned my foot
I thought about when we sat on the bench, and you held me tight by my livelihood
The frame of reference from me to you was always that you were misunderstood
But I never thought about it like that
I never thought about it like that
And I can’t tell whether I want you to come back
I can’t tell whether I want you to come back
The way I’d submit to you, I always felt so attacked
Wished you would pay attention to my words, wanted you to be keeping track
My nerves would pile up- going haywire, getting hijacked
I can say “I love you” then keep myself from getting sidetracked
I can’t seem to fall asleep without reminiscent, beautiful flashbacks

Soft times
Soft times

I think I make them up in my mind
I know for sure you’re leaving me behind
Think it’s good for me at the same time
I press play; you hit rewind

The vision’s always there
You – unaware
Me – trying not to stare
The sunshine’s oblivious glare

The vision’s always there
You, always unaware
Me – feeling so damn scared
Won’t speak up, wouldn’t dare

I can’t seem to fall asleep
You’re in my veins, you’re troubling me
You wouldn’t come sit with me by the crashing sea
Failure to disappear is choking me for eternity
I thought things would improve if I looked more pretty
I tried to speak quieter, say my sentiments softly
I still haven’t realized it has little to do with me

I wish I could erase
Your contemplative face
Your light tan shade of summer’s warmth
I’m taking all the pills
Never feeling thrills
Because the void is haunting me, haunting me still

I can’t change until
My body gets so ill
That I throw up any shadow that reminds me of you
I’m a small girl
I’m losing hope
If you were me, what would you do?

If you were me, what would you do?

You, always unaware
Me – feeling so damn scared
There’s nothing
There’s nothing
But empty space

This life has yet to swallow you

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Poem: White Honda Civic (over you)

Poem: White Honda Civic (over you)

I loved when you had that white Honda Civic
I think I loved the person you were when you were in it
A little optimistic
A tad less sadistic
Revvin’ it up
Making me mad
Falling harder & harder like an annoying pop song
Listening to you breathe when you fall asleep
Telling me I’m always in your dreams

Sobriety was supposed to fix you
Instead, it showed me the real you
So I concluded I can no longer love you
Even though you beat me like a drum
Look good with anything on
Bleed like Kermes vermilio crimson
Bore me to death with the best stories I’ve ever heard
Sentences where you compare me to her
Never allowing me to feel more than unsure
Memories that fade to an unpleasant blur
I couldn’t stop

I knew it was all wrong
You turned my poetry into songs
That you’d play for other girls to make them think you’re good with words
Jazz and ice
Forget paradise
In your lab, I’m all the squirming mice
I know you better than that
Please stay on your Prozac
The world can be so wonderful the day you stop feeling so attacked
& I’m learning to think clearly before I get so attached
You make me so mad
I changed my mind about ever coming back

I can’t
I can’t
Do that dance again
You treat me like God’s biggest mistake
And then tell me heaven isn’t real, it’s all fake
How am I supposed to feel?
How do you know what’s real?
All my favourite people are there
Where do they go when they’re scared?
How upset were they with me when they saw that I didn’t leave but remained aware?
Cappuccinos that are hot
Smiling, and then not
All the blueprints to me – every detail, you forgot
The slow progression of feeling unloved and lost
This is my forever, that’s what I thought

You’re not made for me
You live painfully
I am trying my best to no longer feel sorry for you
The things that you do
You don’t understand their magnitude
Stop singing my lines to girls just to make them fall in love with you
You don’t understand my words
I’m in the ocean with the dead birds
I was so happy you got better, but you only really got worse
I think being caring is my most volatile curse

When I think of you
It’s a reminder to me
Of how oblivious, hopeful, & sad I can be
Especially when I paint rose petals so pink and lovely in my dreams
But the reality of what we are is so far from what it seems
Part of me wishes I was too vapid to think of these things
The emptiness of the situation has a dolefulness it brings
Some days I feel lighter
But for the most part, the powers of retention can really sting
I said I’d do anything

And I sing my own poetry to myself to fall asleep
I’m not trying to impress anyone
I live a life that’s very alone
And I can only hope that from here on I don’t succumb
To keeping somebody close by my side
That won’t buy me flowers because of his pride
You hated the beach, so I never got to feel loved by the tide
Some of my friends seriously thought that I died

Don’t say I didn’t try to help you
In all sincerity, I tried
At what point will I have finally given enough reasons why
I don’t answer your calls
I don’t want you at all

I loved when you had that white Honda Civic
I think I loved the person you were when you were in it

Promising

Thank you for reading! Comment if you have something to say, otherwise stay safe & fall in love with the right people.

Elle

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