Tag: young author

Poem: A city that’s lit by hesitation

distantcaveLeave a comment

Welcome to my poetry website! Pink poems are love poems & blue poems are more general “life” poems. Each poem is interrupted by photographs and ends when you’ve reached the SoundCloud portion.

I’m working on a new email newsletter for post updates. xx

Poem: A city that’s lit by hesitation

I love when you spin your head towards the sea
Make little effort in getting to know me
Velveteen pink intoxicates you & gets you unglued
Turkish golds in Marina del Rey
Thought it was ironic I had no memories of that day
We could pull the cord at the same time

He said
He falls in love way too soon
Well, that’s one way to push me away
Cos if you don’t
Want the love I’m giving you
That’s one way to guarantee I won’t stay

Free-er than a girl in a sundress in a field of crystallized diamonds and wildflowers
Did I hype you up too much
I’m so used to sitting on the sidelines
Perhaps I talked about my love for Chicago a bit much
You temporize your moves to buy some time
In the lights of the city, the hypnotic haze
We were strolling along
And I was thinking
I could really be just about anyone

It’s not my cashmere
Tiffany & Co’s, 2 pairs, credit card swipe
Not about that, huh, too lavish for ya, huh
I’m simple, I’m homemade, I might’ve been
Too much of me for the you that you were showing me when you were standing with a cigarette & I thought you should dispose of that properly in a trash can
Life’s so lavish when it’s only you that’s there for you
I don’t live like that
And I was thinking
I could really be any other girl

He said
He falls in love way too soon
I thought well if that’s so, you should call a cab
Cos I know a love that’s stronger than that
Now that’s one way to push me away
Cos if you don’t
Want the love I’m giving you
Yeah, that’s one way to collapse my stay

I’m in bloom every second of every day
Chrysanthemums growing from the ends of my painted fingernails
Met a guy that didn’t want to get me cut flowers
I thought that’s no way to get through to me
My skin grows every time I bleed
Like just about everyone else in the universe
But I want to matter
I want to be more than a body
I want to be a safe haven
Now that’s one way to push me away
I thought he should really call a cab

Born to sit on a staircase sippin’ a blue raspberry Icee
Dandelions folding around my shoulders
Cut it until it bleeds
Unfold it until you find the serenity
You locked away for nights like these

He said
He falls in love way too soon
I thought
He should
Really call himself a cab

With city lights like these

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Love poem: Initials inscribed

distantcaveLeave a comment

Welcome to my poetry website! Pink poems are love poems & blue poems are more general “life” poems. Each poem is interrupted by photographs and ends when you’ve reached the SoundCloud portion. I didn’t like the Push notification service, so I’m working on a new email newsletter for updates. xx

Love poem: Initials inscribed

I think I got a good one
Don’t want to let him go
But silk and satin separate here
That’s really all I know

Got a gun in my purse
I’m walking on the haunted hills
I don’t mean to tell offbeat jokes
But I like the way it makes you feel

Wavering and wandering, I can’t even see straight
When I throw a dagger, I don’t know where it goes
I don’t want to see red, but I’m so in love with colour
Vivid, I like it vivid, I like the deep blues
That scare you
I’ve been there too
Afraid to be in my own skin
So I can try yours on
Tailor it just right to fit you
Give it to you back clean, with only my initials inscribed
Between your clavicles in cursive font
This is the way the world spins
What are you waiting for, just get in
Breathe a little bit in the boiling river with me

I can take you to
I can take you to the brink of insanity
Though you’ll find it’s more apricot and mesh than you could have dreamed
I know what’s on the other side
Flown there a billion times
The places I don’t know, yeah they’re calling for me
I can take you to the edge of insanity
Show you how blooming and lovely it feels

A beach of all rocks, I’m made of charcoal – this much I know
I’ll be your stepping stone
When you find yourself alone and feel like nobody’s on the line
Oh, I’ll come on by
I drive faster than all the vehicles on the highway combined
Immeasurable, transferable, soft with elegance and no hint of dismay
I’m etched into the clouds for you
Yeah, I’ll be there for you
Show you a world that’s clandestine and brand new
Got it on lock

I tailor my own skin
So that it fits me just right
So that when you look my way
You see me in just the right light

Lie down on this river bed with me
There’s no future, there’s no past
There is only the space
We occupy
For the night

And if
We separate
I’ll have
Pushed you
In the direction you were heading anyway

A love poem about comforting someone.

Sweet boy
Nothing to be scared of
You know that
You know that
Don’t you now

Sacrificing my will

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Love poem: Casualties

distantcave2 Comments

Welcome to my poetry website! Pink poems are love poems & blue poems are more general “life” poems. Each poem is interrupted by photographs and ends when you’ve reached the subscribe/soundcloud portion. xx

Love poem: Casualties

We were driving alongside an emerald beach and I was
Filming a TikTok video of the water, as the waves reached a height that
Didn’t scare me, and suddenly
I looked down & there was water in the car
We were driving through the water
I could breathe
I couldn’t breathe
I could breathe
I was asleep
I couldn’t breathe
Like dandelions
Picked at the wrong time

There were no problems
And we were free
Free to be ourselves, free to get wrapped up in each other
Not constrained by the world propaganda or what’s playing on the news
Television set out of our reach
(Do you even own a television?)
Keyboard in the kitchen sink
Fragrant butterflies

Nape of your neck
Upset stomach
Belly aches for you

There have been nothing but problems
Just me tossed up in you, cradled like the darkest blue
Until we wake up
Foggy skies, hear me out
I’m well familiar with ambivalence
Am very good at counting chirality centers in molecules
Though, when the numbers are in front of me
I wonder if in a different life
I could add them up and find you, again
We’d be soft and innocent
Like dandelion breath
I wouldn’t have to bruise your ego

What would you do
Blank, empty face
I’m well familiar
Can sequence a genome, but can’t figure out how to tell a boy that
I wanted to be the place he calls home

(He’d know if he read my poetry
He’d know if he was in love with me)

Figment of my imagination
Heart palpitations
Misguided communication
On repeat, wouldn’t dare to press rewind
Fast-forward through the archive of my mind
A baby that takes several years to be born
Fully formed
A landscape of an intoxicating tornado with a sunny portrayal of graciousness

What are you indebted for?
When you’re not standing at my front door
Blue ribbons in my hair
A long, pink, satin dress that I
Planned
For the
Occasion

Where I
Would be
Alone
With my patience
Watching little kids chase after their parents
Watching little kids chase after their
Watching little kids chase after
Watching little

Kids holding rose petals
Speaking in Spanish that I understand
Now
How
We
Were

Meant to fall apart so casually

Just like that
We go back
To the places we call home
And we pretend
To not
Care

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Love poem: Lily pad

distantcaveLeave a comment

Love poem: Lily pad

I don’t want to put my cards all over the table
Though I’m dying to show you what’s true
How real this significance is
My significant other

Sitting on my lily pad
You know I’m the only one that can get you to relax
Move in slow motion
I’m heavenly reserved
& I know you don’t do these things on purpose
But the caffeine in this Earl Grey tea
It’s making me nervous
I know you don’t do it on purpose

Swaying with myself in my bedroom
I can be violent if you turn the heat up
No longer desperate to be enough
I’ve got a sweetness concave within me
A fruit I only bear to those that can hold it
Tight

Pushing all my buttons
Convincing myself I kind of love it
Have I shown you what’s at the bottom of the sea?
Underneath all the make-believe

I don’t want to have to ask if you missed me!
I’m getting run over by the same train over and over again
My eyes close when I drive & I don’t even mind
Collect my cigarettes in an empty coke can
Police on a motorcycle
Firearms in my trunk
No longer desperate to be enough
I keep trying to make it to the bottom of the sea
But something pulls me back above
I want you to drown with me
If you do
Make sure I drown too

Don’t read into my words
Don’t touch me softly, then make it hurt
A one-way ticket to my favourite Chicago Transit Authority stop
Where I am free to walk around
I don’t need bells and whistles
I need the fogginess to stop

A rose that blooms
On repeat
A rose that blooms
On repeat
A rose that blooms
When I sleep
A rose that blooms
On repeat

I want you to drown with me
When I get off my
Lily pad

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Love poem: Perfectly real (really perfect)

distantcaveLeave a comment

Love poem: Perfectly real (really perfect)

Suddenly
The impetus is on me
To be perfect, so perfect, for you again
Satin & lavender bedsheets
Fresh clothes from the dryer
Neurons that synapse when the clock resets

But I can’t
Withstand
Dissonance
I can’t
Bear to
Live with regret
I can’t
Break free from
This tangled fishnet
The wire digging its claws directly into my spine

Disengagement when separated
Disregarded how you said maybe
Perhaps it’s my own agenda that
I failed to write out in black ink
My own handwriting looks foreign to me
The flowers in my apartment have finished dying
I closed the curtains, but someone is waiting
To see me burn out like I’ve been on fire this whole time

Carving my name into my solitude
Changing the location of a confined venue
I don’t like this dress
Don’t like how I look in it
Want you to tell me I inspire you to stop playing make-believe
Wish you would bring me roses & be gentle with me
Not let me lose any more sleep

I’m not really writing
I’m scared of defining
How lazy I’ve gotten at building my self-esteem
The ships are all sinking
The pilot keeps blinking
& the leftovers have spoiled because real things are only real in real time

So I hit “unsend”
Spend the afternoon in my garden
Playing with my own hair, saying your name to myself

I can’t even ask you
What you meant when you said nothing
Because I know myself to get in the way of what could be

I’ll trace my ashes
In long cylinder glasses
Faking a proof-of-concept of a girl who takes pride in the way she carries herself

Now I’m scared of writing
Because I don’t like what I see
And that holds far too much meaning to me

I’m sick of trying
To act like I haven’t been
Crying myself to sleep

Tell me I’m perfect
Say that you missed me
Step into my four-chambered studio where the pianos lack keys
& the guitars have no strings
We can dissolve into anything we want life to be

Tell me you missed me
Without lying to me
Tell me I’m perfect
Because you can see how I dream
Tell me you loved how
I didn’t seem desperate
To find in my own self what you’ve found in yours

I’ll rearrange my bedroom
Work on shifting my patterns
So that the stillness in your settings can bleed into me

Tell me I’m perfect
Without lying to me
Reach for me when I’m drowning
In my make-believe sea
Allow me to realize there’s more to let go of
More in life to make sense of
More in this life to see

When you’ve regained stability
Found blue-green lakes filled with clarity
Then, you can come back to me

I’ll be in my garden
Telling myself
That I don’t have to be perfect to be something real

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