Poem: One letter sent, one letter kept (lunar crater)

Poem: One letter sent, one letter kept (lunar crater)

Even the smallest meteorites can make a dent
A shower in the afternoon, music absolutely must play
I can’t give my mind too much space
Tried to hate you, but the action is impossible for me
A sensitive, contemplative queen
Take inspiration from the female main character on my television screen

Dying to spend time outdoors
Perfect place to talk with you
Where nobody can yell
Keep up appearances, keep moving forward
Naturally, I’d be stopping to take photographs of plants
Though I am truly interested to hear how you draft
Your words so carefully and yet,
They still hurt
My own oblivion—how unusual; it’s a first
Why people search for someone to take accountability
Finally makes perfect sense to me
It would mean everything
Though I have no expectations
Now that’s truly uncharacteristic of me

Poem: One letter sent, one letter kept (lunar crater) [continued]

Hold myself close
Hold myself close
Favourite Radiohead song for when I’m depleted
Not what I wanted, perhaps what I needed
To relate to how people in certain circumstances feel
I don’t like it
But I’m committed
To better understand the world
I want fresh florals and my favourite perfume
The sunshine is out there for those that feel consumed
By hospital bills and mental notes
It’s precious, our time, so I’d like to enjoy it
But we’ll never move on if we don’t address it
Neither the one affected nor the one who bears it

It’s shared, can’t you see?
I believe in harmony
Have learned I can never convince somebody to promise me
It’s better like that
The effort sure does count
I’m seeing blue
I think of you

Poem: One letter sent, one letter kept (lunar crater) [continued]

I’m in a gown, I’m ready
The water can take me
Reshape me
She only writes this much when her heart is breaking
Turning hobbies into routines
Cut-outs from magazines I’m framing
Made me feel ill, vomit on a television screen
The way you talk to me
It feels so mean
Your absolute favourite colour is also one of mine
Sage green

Don’t be dramatic
It’s just television static
None of it truly qualifies as far-fetched or theatric
You said there’d be plenty of room
For me
In the dusty attic
I looked for my favourite pen and a piece of A4-lined paper
My words had a breathtaking honesty that made me proud of myself
Celestial equator, vintage coffee maker
Elegant movie-maker
Pretty little lunar crater

One letter sent
One letter kept
If things change, it could be a new beginning
If they don’t, I’ll begin anyway
The sunshine is out there
For those that feel like running away
But once the meteorite hits,
A lunar crater forms
Prettiest thing I think I have ever seen
True harmony

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Poem: Nothing left

Poem: Nothing left

I filed a
Lawsuit
Against the doves in my hallway

Told them they were too
Loving
And now I understand why there’s nothing left

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Poem: Boy-crazy (dollhouse)

Poem: Boy-crazy (dollhouse)

We were sitting in the sun,
Both so much in love,
But you and I are both loners.
We can’t touch each other right now.
Be there for each other right now.
We’re independent and self-made.
We are mirrors of each other, and it breaks my heart too.

I hope you think of me when you see pickup trucks lifted up high,
Pink acrylic nails touching your thigh
Listening to Lana Del Rey with the top of the convertible down,
That’s me.
That’s always me.
That’ll always be me in your memory.

You can tell your friends you’re over it
& I’ll tell mine the exact same
But you’ll hear country music playing somewhere outside
You know things will never be the same

Poem: Boy-crazy (dollhouse) [continued]

I am never getting out of here.
This dollhouse that you shoved me into
With the rosebushes and everything that you know I liked.
You shoved me in because you wanted me to stay with you
But I had other plans and I screamed out,
But it sounded like sand.
I didn’t wanna be in your dollhouse
Shoved by you.

But you say to me,
I thought you were boy crazy
aren’t you boy crazy
I thought you were boy crazy
but you say to me
I thought you were boy crazy
aren’t you boy crazy
I thought you were boy crazy
but you say to me

Don’t you like bad boys
I said no
I said no
I said no

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Poem: Bellflower Blvd

Poem: Bellflower Blvd

Oh, you have no idea of what’s wrong with me
Cos I got a whole long list for ya
But I don’t share it with anyone
I let them find out for themselves
They often don’t
So I can keep my secrets in the amethyst cave
The one that was built just for me
The one they’ll bury me in, in my grave

A lifted, matte black four-by-four driving right over me
Peeling all the smoked cigarettes straight out of yours truly,
I know I look petite, look small, look sweet
But there’s something hidden inside of me that’s so unruly
I am not scared of it – how could I be?
It’s part of me
I don’t think you should be either
George fixed my truck, and he made it real nice
But he drove it over and over straight over me
On a cold, hard, self-manufactured repeat

Poem: Bellflower Blvd (continued)

A large onyx black pickup truck that came with flowers
Baby’s Breath and off-road excellence
Bellflower Blvd is where the finish line is
It’s the name of my dog that I miss like I do Heaven’s remorse
And I can get some quick gains if I gamble right
But I always miss the mark on purpose
Climbing into rabbit holes just to see what’s inside,
If I wasn’t who I am, I’d have so many reasons to hide

Cos I’m tough in the way only a rose bush can be
I see the way that strangers look at me
And I don’t mind if I have to be the only one to believe
In what I am capable of being,
A fruit tree in the middle of nowhere
Pomelos left on the side of the road
That someone was selling but
Forgot about

Poem: Bellflower Blvd (continued)

The people in the car next to me at the stop light
They don’t know why I’m crying about this song.
The people in the car next to me at the stop light
They don’t care why I’m crying to this song
They don’t know why I’m crying about this song
The people in the car next to me at the stop light
They don’t know
It’s Bellflower Blvd

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Love poem: In this form (trembling)

Love poem: In this form (trembling)

Do I want love to make me feel better
Yeah, maybe that’s true
My hands tremble even when I type
Do I want to show you how good I look in that sweater
Yeah, perhaps that’s true
My voice trembles when I speak out loud

I don’t want to hide my sadness, dark caves, or anxiety
My hands tremble even when I write
I know you don’t want me to be anyone else
But could you want me back
When this is my form
I try more and more every day
To stand tall & make my parents proud
But I miss the mark
Still pour my heart out anyway

Love poem: In this form (trembling) [continued]

Do you want me to be me
When this is my form
Have a hard feeling you’ll be saying goodbye
I’m too aware to not know the reasons why
But isn’t it kind of cute that my hands shake
Even when I am doing nothing at all

We could pick strawberries
When the season arrives
Because even though this is my form
I look so beautiful when I’m pleasantly surprised
Can you think of why
I don’t want you to know me by
My unwashed dishes and unfolded clothes
I just want to make you smile

Love poem: In this form (trembling) [continued]

When this is my form
I just want to help you breathe
I know how to put others first
While also taking care of me
I know you don’t see the Christmas lights
I’ve kept up to bring myself joy
But can you take me in this form
And be the most patient boy

I don’t want to say goodbye
I think only I know the reason why
I won’t say it out loud
Because my voice trembles when I speak

Love poem: In this form (trembling) [continued]

Can I say it anyway
Can I say it soon
Can I say it now
Can I say it at noon
Can I say it anyway
Can I say it at noon
Before you decide
To do what you wanted to do

I think I’ve said it now
Yeah, maybe that’s true
I even got my nails painted
Picked out my outfit for you

I think I’ve said it now
Yeah, maybe that’s true
Can I say it again
Sometime soon

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