Category: Blues

Poem: A city that’s lit by hesitation

distantcaveLeave a comment

Welcome to my poetry website! Pink poems are love poems & blue poems are more general “life” poems. Each poem is interrupted by photographs and ends when you’ve reached the SoundCloud portion.

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Poem: A city that’s lit by hesitation

I love when you spin your head towards the sea
Make little effort in getting to know me
Velveteen pink intoxicates you & gets you unglued
Turkish golds in Marina del Rey
Thought it was ironic I had no memories of that day
We could pull the cord at the same time

He said
He falls in love way too soon
Well, that’s one way to push me away
Cos if you don’t
Want the love I’m giving you
That’s one way to guarantee I won’t stay

Free-er than a girl in a sundress in a field of crystallized diamonds and wildflowers
Did I hype you up too much
I’m so used to sitting on the sidelines
Perhaps I talked about my love for Chicago a bit much
You temporize your moves to buy some time
In the lights of the city, the hypnotic haze
We were strolling along
And I was thinking
I could really be just about anyone

It’s not my cashmere
Tiffany & Co’s, 2 pairs, credit card swipe
Not about that, huh, too lavish for ya, huh
I’m simple, I’m homemade, I might’ve been
Too much of me for the you that you were showing me when you were standing with a cigarette & I thought you should dispose of that properly in a trash can
Life’s so lavish when it’s only you that’s there for you
I don’t live like that
And I was thinking
I could really be any other girl

He said
He falls in love way too soon
I thought well if that’s so, you should call a cab
Cos I know a love that’s stronger than that
Now that’s one way to push me away
Cos if you don’t
Want the love I’m giving you
Yeah, that’s one way to collapse my stay

I’m in bloom every second of every day
Chrysanthemums growing from the ends of my painted fingernails
Met a guy that didn’t want to get me cut flowers
I thought that’s no way to get through to me
My skin grows every time I bleed
Like just about everyone else in the universe
But I want to matter
I want to be more than a body
I want to be a safe haven
Now that’s one way to push me away
I thought he should really call a cab

Born to sit on a staircase sippin’ a blue raspberry Icee
Dandelions folding around my shoulders
Cut it until it bleeds
Unfold it until you find the serenity
You locked away for nights like these

He said
He falls in love way too soon
I thought
He should
Really call himself a cab

With city lights like these

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Poem: A million shelves

distantcaveLeave a comment

Welcome to my poetry website! Pink poems are love poems & blue poems are more general “life” poems. Each poem is interrupted by photographs and ends when you’ve reached the SoundCloud portion. I’m currently testing a Push notification application. xx

Poem: A million shelves

A maroon carcass that rests gently on the edge of the seashore
Fresh propane tank
Exclusively at your local corner store
Wearing my baby blue doll dress
Headaches from thinking about it

What we’ve been through
I see it in the corners of this melting igloo
Turn up the temperature
Sit on the fire escape, heavenly embrace
Homemade campfire, fire burning up your home
As the water droplets cascade down
I see fiber nectar start to turn upside down

Look through the hole on your door
To see who’s been knocking all night long
Cut the stems from fresh flowers in that old vase
Hasn’t lost its sparkle
The years are like lightning cables, but I’m so stable
Looking through the hole in my door
To see who’s been scraping at my windshield all night long

A poem about choosing whether to renovate oneself.

Such a romantic scene, velvet slippers & cleaning-service-fresh satin
Mop up discarded memories
I aim to please, I aim to please
Now I put myself first
And the whole world is to burn
Too busy listening to jazz to look through the hole in the door
You can leave a note
You can leave a note

Notebook paper by my bedside
Ash covers my deep green eyes
You’d think I’d be surprised
That disks of memories still replay in my mind
While I drive in the rain
Smiling, smiling all the way
Thunder shifting my car
Absolving into the reminisce that is the end of this year

Turn up the temperature
Sit on the fire escape
You tell people not to do what you really want them to
Leave a note
Leave a note

Be the bigger man
Nine minutes until the fan
Turns off for the evening & I’m left to writhe in this heat

Look after me
Don’t look behind yourself when you walk down the street
Holding a pomegranate smoothie
Writing my website in sharpie on street signs

Be the bigger man
Cradle your face in your hands
Turn up the temperature
Turn off the faucet
Sit on the fire escape
Leave a note and then toss it

The trash can that held a million versions of your most real self

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Poem: Wedding dress

distantcaveLeave a comment

Welcome to my poetry website! Pink poems are love poems & blue poems are more general “life” poems. Each poem is interrupted by photographs and ends when you’ve reached the Soundcloud portion. The previous subscribe application was not working, so I’ll be testing new ones out soon. x

Poem: Wedding dress

Venom under relapse
I had nothing more to say when you turned away
I like it here in my baby pink clandestine cave
Nothing to eat me away, sharp fumes
Fiber optics, flesh under a microscope
Baby voices & sketches of solid diameter

Box hair-dye doesn’t quite get the colour right
But God knows I keep on trying
I don’t often think about it, but I’m so afraid I won’t get what I want
That might be what’s best, after all
If an admissions team reads my name right
That might be the very first time
That might be what’s best, after all

A long Victorian sundress for sitting by the pool
I think it’s meant to be this way that I often feel misunderstood
I no longer try to say the right things
But then, I find I’m not saying anything
At all
At all
To anyone at all

I remember when I found those pretty songs
That I’d listen to along my drive to and back from university
Had this feeling like something was going on
So I wrapped myself up in the most beautiful love songs
Taking me to a
Place
I didn’t occupy
No, not that night
For that long drive
Wrapped up tight
White crystals shredded into fine crisps
Daisies in my long blonde hair

In another life, you could call me up, tell me you’re happy for me too
Like I am happy for you
Relieved for you
Green dress, she wore a green dress
Had the ceremony of her dreams

Fairy tale, matchmaker – let go of you so you could find your way to her
In another life, I’ll evade this charcoal castle
Won’t ride a horse because I care for animals of all kinds
Won’t check the mailbox, I know no one would write
I’m ink that bleeds through
Covers your wrists like a car’s headlights
Sews your eyes shut so that you could sleep
Comfortably, finally, elusively

I know what’s appropriate
That is- me, driving to the prettiest love songs
If the admissions team doesn’t pronounce my name right
That’s perfectly fine

You belong where you belong, in the end
Hate every single second
They’ll miss you so much back home

Wishing to see snow
Wishing to see snow
Wishing to see snow
Wishing to see snow

Wrapped up tight
White crystals shredded into fine crisps
Daisies in my long blonde hair

Had the ceremony of her dreams
On white amphetamines

A love poem about finding out a former boyfriend got married.

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A very long poem: Demolition

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A very long poem: Demolition

Menthol cigarettes got me feeling alive
Thank God for Texas not outlawing them
I missed this heavenly mint
Sterile landscape
Below the Mason-Dickinson line
I got wrinkles in my dress
& lately I’ve been right on time
For you to let me down

I been around waterfalls, but I haven’t seen it all
Stole a daisy ring from a convenience store
To be fair, it fell right out of its placement
To make the perfect vacation
I take a glance in the mirror and, I tell myself, I like what I see
Vacuum clean the ceiling on repeat
My tranquility wasn’t enough for this collapsing bridge
It came falling down upon me

I wish I could see what my lungs look like
Added another year to my timeline
Embodying an ancient goddess
Fading but getting closer to flawless
We’re stained on purpose cos that’s how God made his men
It’s you I’m talking about
It’s you I’m writing about
See trees you would like, decide to set them on fire
Broken barn door
Matches the stains on the floor
I’m a mess, can’t you tell
I clean everything I touch
Wipe the slate
Wipe the slate
Wash away your misguided truths in the swarming, crestfallen waves
Fears in disarray

Wheat fields are my daydreams
Inject rose thorns directly into my cheeks
Pain is surreal
It glows in the evening
Makes everyone’s headlights look more appealing
The bridges that overlap on the highways in Texas are making me lose my mind
Listen to me when I talk about what is perfection to me
In a room full of blank faces
I have nobody to tell
Anything that matters to me

Would you know the colour of my eyes if not for a close-up photograph
Oh, lucky you
I see a leaf
That you might like
It happens again
The rolled up wheat I crumbled in my pocket
Men of old age smoking tobacco on their truck beds by the corner liquor store
Am I self-absorbed because I run through my own mind
I’m so sick of saying things that people don’t understand
Like, who am I
Who am I to you
A close-up photograph
I’m at my best, I’ll tell you that

Safe with me
Demolition
I’m safe in my own arms
Tuck my tattooed thighs close to my chest
Pull myself in
Vomit lakes up
Then I see
A rose so lovely it softens my hair &

Leaves me dying to see how good my lungs are doing
When I smoke tobacco on a rusty truck bed
Little place for myself
Diamonds in my eyes
You wouldn’t know the colour
If you couldn’t reference it in a close-up photograph

We’re stained on purpose cos that’s how God made his women
Would it kill you
Would it kill you
Awake in your sleep

Safe only when I’m with me
Demolition
Demolition

They scream loudest at night

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Poem: Coming home

distantcaveLeave a comment

Poem: Coming home

My angel of all angels
I look for you everywhere
One jagged footstep after another
Saw so much of myself in you
Wanted to keep you safe
Shield you from the venomous, foggy skies

One pebble that forms an entire ocean
I’m enjoying the alone time
But I think of you constantly
(How could I not?)
At the edge of my lavender & velvet bed
Gorgeous brown eyes
A diameter so perfect it could bring me to tears

Fascinated by police sirens,
A villain that’s scared of nothing
In love with the sheer chaos of vitality, as am I
To be young and to grow old
Never do what you’re told
Watch television with me as the evening unfolds
Real perfection encapsulated, one single moment
Your brown eyes on repeat every single day

Us walking around the Windy City
You – looking so pretty
Me hopelessly attached to the fibers within you
A skeleton I
Sought to preserve
So I could run my fingers along your delicate spine
Happy

Lost dog
Posters of you everywhere
(In my mind)
Trying to figure out where it is, you went
Thinking whether and to what extent God was involved
It’s been three months, and it feels like you just left
I swear I can still feel you right there.

You were that vicious one on the street
Didn’t accept anyone else’s morals as your own
When you were with me,
Our worlds would never collide.
Felt like a perfect unison of all the good and evil in this world.
And I loved that about you
How you kept my secrets in a safe place
Somewhere nobody has been able to find

I take the exit to Bellflower Boulevard
I see you all over the place
Can you see me driving in the night?
Can you see me driving like I’m coming home to you?

Coming home to you
Can you see me coming home to you?
Wrapped up in my memories of you
Do you wonder where I am, too?

Lost dog
I tell God
Breathe the life into me that you took out of her.
I think I’ve seen and felt it all
I’m ready for you to come home
I’m ready for you to come home
My angel
My angel
My angel
My angel

Come home
Your brown eyes on repeat
Every single day

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