Category: Uncategorized

Poem: Paranoid and proud (10,000 times)

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Paranoid and proud (10,000)

Enigmatic, or desolate

I knock on your door slowly
Trembling
I don’t want to interrupt your work
You tell me to crawl over to the desk
I said babe, I’ve got a headache
My hair is a mess
I can’t pass your tests

I’m stupid and paranoid
None of your answers make sense
Where were you last Tuesday
Who was that in the car
You reach for another cigar
You’re the most beautiful boy but your personality is tar
You’re mean about my scars

A variation of you and me (but it’s just a fantasy)

The white roses have died
Is it me or my pride
That I always remind you of how my favorite man died
I know I’m a burden, I scream on the inside
Walking on eggshells
Tiny glass fragments
When you threw the vase at the wall because you couldn’t find your glasses
The white roses, they’ve died anyway
Entered a state of decay
Quite like I have, and it’s how I will stay
The light has left me, what do you make of my remains
I’m more revolting every day

Chaos and butterflies
Surprise me with flowers
Plant a tree every time you yawn when I talk about my interests
If this isn’t love or lust then what is this
Why do I sit on your lap every time you come around
How come I put my face to a pillow so that I don’t make a sound
How come you told me that the next time I get lost you hope I won’t ever be found
Like pitch black surround sound

I turn to the other side
I do my best to hide
Is that another exhibition of my pride?

You told me you loved to listen
You lied
Ten thousand times

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Instragram: @Lilacdovee

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Poem: You with me is everything in proper place

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You with me is everything in proper place

Your parochial validation
Doesn’t intimidate me
I’m a lady of glamour,
Roses on vines,
Harnessing all my glory and putting it together into one piece
You’re the only missing piece
And I stay awake
Writing in my notebook pages
About how I want to go to the beach with you
Laugh with the seagulls, watch them fly
Coca Cola and oranges, that’s how you get by
You’re so funny
Come with me

When the roles are reversed
And you’re the one that’s bruised and burnt
I’ll be right here,
Close enough for you to reach
Let me be the soundbite in your ear
The graphite pencil you sketch your model automobiles with
You are my type
My type of carrying-on soldier, king of the tanks
You’re so far away from me
So far away from me
I take a breath calmly
The fog washes all over me

And you’re the one that’s bruised and burnt
Baby with me, you’ll never, ever be hurt
Just you and me at the cinema
On the dangerous fire escapes
Cigarette smoke, you can inhale the taste
You with me is everything in proper place

The support that I need
The love
The love I need
The love I-

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Poem: Free,

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Crimson red glass
With soft etiquette
Returned because I don’t drink
The girls chatter as is expected
All I’m thinking about is the moon
Waxing crescent
Full moon in ten days
The girls think it’s special
I just like knowing how it’s turning around the little place I occupy
I start to feel shy

Go out for drinks,
Order nothing
I’ve decided I no longer drink
It helps my alibi
They don’t question why
I miss diving in the crystal lake

What’s idyllic to me, I think about it
I dream a little bit too much
My eyes are pale jade and isle Royale
Nobody memorizes their color, but what can I do
Can’t be blue
In a whirlpool where I can escape
Pale sea-foam covers my body and shows that I’m smiling
Breathless
Free spirit

I don’t want to plateau.

Steel trains

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I am bored and companionless
I come home, shut the steel door
Lock it 4, 5, 14 times
Grace my palm across the slate kitchen counter
Indulge in the cleanliness of no longer having someone occupy my chateau
My alcazar
Mine

The train runs by
Fifty times an hour
And I suck in the fumes like a child enjoys putting their hands on a hot stove
Ice

There’s a moody sky above
So I prepare for my favorite part of existence,
Standing on my balcony smoking menthol cigarettes alone
Careful where I ash
Watching the city skyline in the distance
Men in grey and black suits
Serving their role
They inspire me with their daily perseverance
Don’t mock it till you try it

I used to be afraid of the dark
Now the dark to me is Pittsburgh grey
I empty my handbag’s contents and find
1 pigeon feather
I feel like I have it all together
Even the birds want to be me

I am bored and companionless
The city skyline says it’s time
The felted wool of my grandmother’s blanket comforts me these minutes, now
Preoccupied
With wondering
About the Industrial Revolution and how to identify a black widow
I’m on edge, can’t you tell
I’m searching for something

I’m on edge, can’t you tell
I’m always searching for something

At my expense

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My imagination takes me to dark places in the world
I’m too stubborn to run away
And I know nobody will come with me
I rid of all my expectations

You said love and beauty cannot coexist with analysis
But you don’t know the things I think of you
When you swim laps and I admire you
Luxury like a dripping rose
God can’t help me

I put your Cubs cap back on
And search for defects in you
Because it cannot be true
I’m banging my head, I’m so sick of you
I like you

Secrecy and solitude
Come kiss me in the closet
Try on your best white button-down
You teach me how to tie a tie
I keep getting it wrong because I’m weak

Saturdays with you
Watching how much your cat adores you
She’s practically floored by you
There must be something about you
I look away

I know it’s irrational
For me to open myself up to love again

So I keep practicing how to tie a tie
So one day I can kiss you goodbye