She eyes me like a Virgo when I am weak

For you
All the film in the world
Developed and processed by yours truly
I come here to River North
Where the stingy, thin dudes hang out alone with their best companions, their cameras
A best companion to have indeed
I can’t argue a statement
In place of a lover at times
Fits in a bag and zooms at crisp angles
But I, I’m a lucky one
I’ve got both a camera and a lover
A sweet, charming kind
I’m going to make you mine
After all, it happens all the time
My turn to land me a dime

I take footage of you
Anything and everything you do
Side profile of a model who couldn’t model if he tried
You give me a cheap smirk and inside I almost die
A cheap flannel and you’re ace
The passenger seat is my place
You told me to stop you from smoking but you look oh so cool dragging that tar pit trap, he sang to us in our early school days
And there it comes on the radio
You dance like you’re out of place
Like a baby fumbling around a car seat
At least you’re humming to the right beat
My date for the night is so neat
Sometimes life feels so complete

I’m looking in your light brown eyes
Your hand innocently rests between my thighs
Can’t help but grasp how you’re single
“Do you ever get out, do you mingle?”
Not for a profession, no
You’ve got me losing control, woah
Your bed is only compiled of a mattress and I make fun of your lack of infrastructure so with the bedding you aim to suffocate me
But my eyes are closed and I’m having a ball
At that moment I really had it all
Wasn’t answering any of my missed calls
I knew I was going to be your pitfall

I laugh and I struggle and I think to myself, you must be so strong
To hold a young girl captive is really so wrong
I try to break free by asking you to change the song
But it’s by voice-command so you hold me all night long
I knew we’d get along

And I rest on your chest
Cradle my body against yours
Ask you a few more things
About your peace and your wars
Run my fingers through your soft, brown hair
Like chestnut wood, gleaming
Warmth like boiling water, steaming
And I can feel you squeaming
Like it’s been a while since you’ve been with a girl
Like you’re not ready to let her into your world
Affection is one thing but love is out of the question
Intangible
Unscripted
Unwanted
And you don’t know what will be on my mind when those topics enter my cerebral cortex

Though tonight I’m holding on tight
Because boys keep hurting me and I think I found a nice one
That I can go driving with
Run to the market with for chrysanthemums
Share the absolute nonsense that encompasses my experiences in the joy of life
And maybe when the pain comes, it doesn’t have to be intentionally targeted at me
No fist fights
No drunken brawls and cleaning up blood from disorder and confusion
No hiding in the bathroom with the door locked
A boy who lets a girl capture his light not only on camera but off of it, too
The labels come after

For you
All the honesty in the world
This won’t be the tar our pasts are stained with
Me,
You,
A mattress on the floor,
And all the film in the world


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