Lilac Dove

Me and your alcoholism
Don’t seem to mix
Like candlelit bricks
Versace heels
Split in half
Men’s perfume on my sweater
I find myself pure
And I’m not interested in your thoughts

For right now
It’s pure bliss
The carnations grow in the right directions
And I have my hair in a ponytail
You tell me my blush looks nice and pink
Saturated like the sun
Less than heavy like the eclipse we saw last week

Okay pretty girl, you soothe me
In ways that I find a bit refined
And partially reduced in such a way
But I’ll take it
If it comes from you
I’ll take it

Like a silver moon
Like morning dew

I walked past the store and saw some carnations
Thought of how frustrating it is
That you and me don’t share enough about ourselves anymore
Or really as much as I’d like to

And I felt on that dazzling Spring day
The most bitter of delights
The midpoint between wanting to be in your presence
And wanting my own independence
And I’m sure that won’t come out right

I left my doubts in Virginia
At Smith Mountain Lake
Where the mountains cascade to the water
And I come up for air, crisp and smooth
Forever thinking of you

Forever drowning in you
And it’s glistening

Spring fever and new nails
They’re pink and I’m pretty
I’m like mauve dresses in Mississippi

Jail break me til dawn
I’ve got that modern edge
Can’t you by now start to tell

We fall out and in
This thickened, shining beach spot where we lie back
Don’t light a few no longer
We put our old habits to rest

I’m lighter now, I feel fine
You hear me talking about that all the time
And I quiet down cos I’m not one to whine
Like a schoolchild

Knee up and rocking forwards on your femur
Back and forth not set in place
So misbehaved
You always make the first moves

I’m a hundred waves of your favorite ocean
Several kisses in your enamored cave
Don’t you wish we would wish the same

Oh, to entertain
Oh, to once more explain

Your illegitimacy, I love it
I’ve never been quite to be, “Don’t be real with me”
Like I was above it

The debauchery and the starlight glamour
And how the moon strikes your eyes hard

Joint clauses have nowhere to go
And you say come spend the night
But I’m not sure if I’m made to flee
Or pull a silent fight

These aspiring hopes, descending acquisitions
Breathe me like a piano bed
Talk shit to me about the heroes we never actually have met

This scale has a tune
A marching band
Who wants to be included

But I grip hold of this balcony
And wonder why if everyone’s being deluded

Sweet dahlias that you admire, don’t tear
Even though you’re so unaware
Your disenchantment is what’s “cool” these days

A million ways
to tell me I look pretty
You choose none of the above because that’s not how you live

When you’re serious you can still be made to chuckle
Those hard nights— I’ll wrap them up like weeds
Never to later retrieve

Driving with sunspots coming our way
Boy with a denial of using navigation
Im thinking you love the abstraction

Me curled up on your couch
Purse on the floor, heels on the side
I’m having a party in your living room

Don’t fight it
I’m having a party in your living room
Downin’ Skinny Girl and gleaming

Falling asleep to this
A new point of view
from your living room