Category: Uncategorized

April rain

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I’m memorizing
The numbers to call
For emergencies

You, you’re there for me
Like a ship set for sail
I’m calm but I’m feeling pale
On the cusp of letting you go
Pausing
Trembling
So I have to let you know

With you
It feels like the April rain has washed me
Absolved me
A bathtub with rose petals
3, 4, 35
Put my photographs on your hard drive
We’re living past forty-five

Walk along the dock
You speak to me in paragraphs
We share our love and exchange laughs
Holding your hand is scary
Don’t know when the next time will be
There’s no guarantee
No security

Arm wrapped around me, in the living room we dance
I stare at the fire and fall deeply into the romance
A flight delay
Sweetheart, won’t you stay

I need a portrait to make this permanent
Don’t you dare look away
If I start to feel vulnerable
Know you made me this way

And that’s okay

Semi-automatic (dorsal fins)

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Pastel colors soothe me
Boys, they think they can use me
I’m wearing the dainty lace
You dropped at the end of my bed
Won’t you take a look at me instead?

Your golden glow is irrational
My love for this country is national
I can always taste liquor on your tongue
I hope you don’t think you’re still alive and young
The roaring twenties have just begun
Touch me like I’m warmer than the sun
Do you trust me to hold on to your semi-automatic handgun

I have a habit of making boys cry
I’ve no idea, I don’t even try
Your living room is smothered in country beige
I’ve come in from the back-house with soft, grey sage
My little author, I see you’ve only written half a page
It’s alright to be shy when you’re at this stage

Bears and beers, so the license plate says
I’m a pretty girl so I’m the server in this place
We go out at night, spot tails and dorsal fins
Ride until I feel my eyes caving in

A lost canyon when I once knew
That I don’t want my little boy to grow up just like you
So I did what all of the other mariners do,

I drowned you.

Abscess (God)

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I broke my favorite CD while I was opening it
Because of my fake nails
Imagining better versions of you
My ways of moving on, they fail
I’ll tell you a crystal-clear tale
One you’ll save for the books
A story about how much I miss my father
The one who blessed me with good looks
My mother too – but now she grieves
We encounter noone but liars and thieves
I like how I’m surrounded by crisp Autumn leaves.
No time to dream.

I recall a beautiful lullaby
It was his very own way of saying goodbye
I still wonder why.
My hands shake as I type
I’m so lost in this mess
I’m watching you swell like a grimy abscess
Call a cab.

Social disturbances
I fade into obscurity
Nobody reads my poetry
I know I won’t live until my thirties
I wasn’t made for this world
It gets more clear every day
I wake up with bruises
Impossible to wash away
God made me this way.

Decay
Decay
Decay
Decay

God tells me to stay.

Ambivalence (trigger)

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Small
Metal
Chain
Hangs around your wrist
Lean in, give me a kiss
I know lust is just like this

All black attire
Hang on you like barbed wire
Set me on the wildest fire
I’m kind of amazed that you’d think like that
Get to the brink like that
Like magnets attract
I’m solid in your haze
I’m what the world has to be amazed
I’ve caught you in my brilliant gaze
Though it’s never enough
It’s never enough
Look at you, you’re so tough
Wild animal, put you in cuffs
Set me on the wildest fire

I’m ambivalent with remorse
I’ve told you a million times
You won’t catch me with a fine
You’ll lose every time
I’m beautiful and I know
Wild horses are for show
Snowboard on soft snow
My beauty is how I glow

You’ll try to escape
I’m wild and I’m hot
You can feel it in the taste
A strong lust to embrace
Do you like your wishes fulfilled?
Gorgeous photograph, a still
Seek revenge, I’ll fulfill
I’m the softest girl you know

I’ve told you a million times
I’m beautiful and I know
Look at you, you’re so tough
My beauty is how I glow

Do you like your wishes fulfilled?
Finger on the trigger, hold still

Rosemary (white roses)

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I bought white roses
Because I knew you wouldn’t
I knew it would happen like that
I have a penchant for knowing when my heart is going to break
But it stings the same
It stings just as bad
I knew it would happen like that

I changed the flowers’ water
And I cut the ends of the stems
We were happy back then
You never stayed past ten
I was alone at night with a glass of red wine
Just to pass the time
I wanted you to be mine
I wanted you with white roses
I wanted to be the closest
To getting you to change your mind about being the bad one in everyone’s life
Rosemary and chives
Don’t touch my thighs
Just to pass the time

I have a penchant for knowing when my heart is going to break
Regardless of the season it was you who made me ache
I couldn’t take it anymore but I was too strong to break
I wanted to be the closest to getting you to change
Your mind about being the bad one
In everyone’s life

Rosemary and chives
You can no longer touch my thighs
I wanted you to be mine
I wanted you to be mine

Ripe cherries, beehives
Goodbye